Every first Wednesday of the month, except this month due to tomorrow being July 4th – Independence Day in the US, the IWSG (Insecure Writer’s Support Group) engages writers to share their fears, thoughts, progress, struggles, excitement, encouragement, or anything really, about their writing. A different question is posed each month, as a writing prompt. Answering it is optional. For July, the question is: “What are your ultimate writing goals, and how have they changed over time (if at all)?”
This amazing, supportive group of writers was founded by Alex J. Cavanaugh. Today, the co-hosts are Nicki Elson,Juneta Key, Tamara Narayan, and Patricia Lynne. Feel free to swing by their sites and see what they’re up to.
My answer to the question (“What are your ultimate writing goals, and how have they changed over time (if at all)?”)
When I was younger, I wrote for pleasure. It was an urge, it was natural, a part of my every day – document my experiences in diaries, letters to family, and later email reports in Dutch and English for whoever was interested. Giant parts of my life consisted of travel. My first blog, It’s Irie, replaced these reports. Writing was about informing others how things were going, wherever I was, and what the world looked like. Another goal was to have my writing in one place for the future. Whenever I’d retire, I’d be bored and happily reread all these stories, I thought.
My childhood desk in Belgium is not getting much use during this visit.
With my second blog (this one), published articles, and current work in progress (my memoir), I hope to draw people into our lives to experience a more alternative lifestyle the easy, armchair way, but also to inspire them to expand their own horizons, discover new places, and push beyond their comfort zone once in a while. I’d like to show that it’s possible, and affordable, to travel extensively and break away from the social norm.
My ultimate writing goals are to enjoy the process and affect my readers. It would be nice to make some money with it one day as well. 🙂
My book progress
About a week into our two-week RV trip, I created an email and an information sheet, compiled my memoir manuscript from Scrivener into a Word document, and sent the bundle off to a group of hand-picked beta readers. Immediately, the “I should have” moments arrived, and I contemplated sending changes. I refrained, realized the manuscript was gone now – out of my hands – and that I needed to deal with all consequences. Gulp. Since then, I’m on a break from my book, since I’m busy with other things. This summer is chaotic, with little time for writing and internet.
Busy in Belgium: making a Mesa Verde National Park puzzle with my niece Lena
Once I receive feedback, there is more work on the horizon, but for now I’m relieved that the book is in the hands of amazing beta readers, and I thank them from the bottom of my heart for all their help, time, effort, and insights.
Memoir excerpt
In March, I shared an excerpt of the prologue (“Mid-ocean”) of my memoir, which has the temporary title “Floating About – A Life Less Ordinary”. A blog post last year included a section of the first chapter (“A True Kiss and a False Start”). For April, I provided an excerpt of the second chapter (“From Seasick to Lovesick”), and, in May, I continued the tradition with an excerpt of the third chapter (“Trying Anew”). Last month, you could read an excerpt of chapter four, which is called “Big Trouble or All Good?”
This month, we’re touching on chapter five, “Only If I Have to”. Picking these excerpts is getting more difficult, as we are progressing in the memoir, and I don’t want to give away too much. The following part is more of a character sketch than crucial content for this chapter.
Jim, Mark, and I walk to an upscale bar at the circle. Our yacht broker-turned-friend Tommy joins us. What happens next, is a blur of drinking, laughing, much-needed companionship, and fun. As always, I’m at a loss in an American bar. There are no drinking menus to browse. I really need to know the prices of everything, before I buy something, whether we’re in a grocery store, a restaurant, or a bar. It drives me nuts not having any idea of what a product costs. There have been many times in the past, where I lugged heaps of groceries to a price scanner, before putting them in my cart, or, more often, placing them back on the shelf. Maybe it’s because of incidents in less-developed countries I visited, where locals try to take advantage of “rich” tourists by overcharging them, maybe it’s because I’m used to price tags and ever-present menus in Belgium, or maybe it’s because of my incorrigible frugalness, but ordering a beverage in the States stresses me out. Asking the waitress in the bar how much a certain beverage costs is usually received with a blank stare. She either doesn’t know, and needs to check on the computer, or the question takes her by surprise. It must be nice to never have to worry about money, and just order whatever you want, I think.
“I wonder how much a Cosmopolitan costs,” I whisper to Mark. I’ve never had one, and am curious to try it.
“Order whatever you want,” he replies. “It’s your special day.” He has a point. Still it’s a big mental step for me not to inquire about the cost of my order, and let go of my worry about the bill. After a couple of sweet martinis, that part gets easier.
Comments – especially tips/improvements in regards to the excerpts – are always appreciated.
July 3, 2018 at 06:50
I remember reading that excerpt and thinking the same thing – why don’t they have a drinks menu? How do I know how much a beer is going to cost?
Love the picture of you doing the puzzle with your niece. And there’s no need for those “I should have…” moments. And I should know, cause I’m partway through reading it 🙂
July 3, 2018 at 10:54
Few places (especially bars) have drink menus in the US, I find. And, in many stores, price tags are missing, whether it’s in the deli, or on other products. Since we rarely shop in the same place(s), because of our constant moving, we can’t just pick a store that suits us and keep going there.
Thank you so much for all your help with the beta reading, Ellen. And, you of all people, know the mixed emotions that come once you hit that send button. 🙂
July 3, 2018 at 07:04
That moment… Ah… There’s always the question of what if in our writing. Who knew it applied to the process as well? Here’s hoping for awesome responses, regardless!
July 3, 2018 at 10:57
If there wouldn’t be “what ifs”, how could we be called the insecure writer’s support group, right? 🙂 Worried and looking forward to those responses at the same time…
July 3, 2018 at 07:10
I think it’s a good idea to step away from your memoir while the beta readers review it, and enjoy your time in Belgium. New energy and fresh look at the feedback when you return will make your memoir even better.
July 3, 2018 at 10:59
You are totally right, Natalie. While I often feel guilty “forgetting” about the manuscript these days, and as many times feel antsy to keep working on other parts that have to do with this book, it is better to step away right now, and do the other things that require my attention. I knew it would be a very busy summer, so I’m glad I managed to send it off.
July 3, 2018 at 07:29
It bothers me when I don’t know the price of things. Also, I love puzzling! I’m doing a lot of #AudioPuzzling lately, with the help of my library’s app for free audiobooks. Happy IWSG day! http://www.raimeygallant.com
July 3, 2018 at 11:01
Audio puzzling… I’ve never heard of such a thing. I should check it out. I never have time to puzzle, and I think the last time I ever made one, was when my niece was five years old or so. It’s a nice pastime to relax and forget everything else, until the veranda gets too hot, or it’s lunch time. 🙂
July 3, 2018 at 09:49
You inform people of a different way to live – I can see you making money from that in several ways.
Enjoy the time away from writing.
July 3, 2018 at 11:09
Thanks, Alex. Monetizing has not been a big incentive yet, when it comes to writing e-books or articles, but I might look into that in the future. There is so much to write about, and so little time! Then, there is the fact that I enjoy exploring the world… Choices!
July 3, 2018 at 09:51
Trust in the Beta. They will bump it up. 😉
Anna from elements of emaginette
July 3, 2018 at 11:10
Well said! I totally trust in the Beta(s), and know they will improve the works.
July 3, 2018 at 10:16
Hi Liesbet! I think it is only natural to have a doubt (or two) when you send your creation off to others. It’s a big –but very important–step! But having the input of others is so very helpful because even if you don’t take their suggestions (yeah, I might be talking about mine 🙂 ) you can re-evaluate what you really think is important and how you want to continue. How can that not make your book the best it can be! I hope you’re enjoying your visit with family and your summer is going well. I love what emaginette says, “Trust in the Beta. They will bump it up!” ~Kathy
July 3, 2018 at 11:13
It’s nice to be back in Belgium, Kathy, but my real life is elsewhere. During this visit, I’ve had some interesting emotions and realizations. I feel like I’m wrapping up most of my life here, right now. Bittersweet!
Thank you so much for being one of my beta readers. I will consider all the suggestions, and I appreciate everyone’s take on my approach and content. That will make the book better, for sure. One day, our combined efforts will produce a finished project I can hopefully be happy about and proud of.
July 3, 2018 at 12:11
Finding your blog has been awesome. I’ve absolutely loved reading about your adventures, and it has made me want to live more boldly. Now whether or not I actually act on that wish remains to be seen. Keep up the amazing work. You are an inspiration to many, including me.
July 4, 2018 at 02:52
Oh Ryan, that is so nice to say. You know I LOVE to inspire, provoke action, or at least some reflection. You’ve made my day. Better than fireworks on the Fourth of July. 🙂 And, since I have to miss that in Belgium right now, I take it, and I wish you a happy Independence Day!
July 3, 2018 at 14:33
So glad to see you enjoying your time in Belgium and taking some time to relax. Writing can be so draining even if we love it! Congrats on getting your manuscript to your Beta readers–a huge step and oh-so-exciting!
July 4, 2018 at 02:53
Writing breaks are good, Terri. Even though I’d love to continue work on this book. Other priorities prevail – they seem to come every other month for two months. 🙂 Happy summer writing to you and success with your No Excuses Fitness book!
July 3, 2018 at 16:08
I have those “should have” moments whenever I submit a partial. I could edit something endlessly and still not be satisfied.
July 4, 2018 at 02:55
Mmmm… Why does that sound familiar? And, why do writers have to be perfectionists? I don’t think any of the books we write and publish is ever perfect, in our own eyes anyway.
July 3, 2018 at 16:34
On Saturday I received my memoir manuscript back from a beta reader. I didn’t open it until today. The comments will prompt me to make changes, but first of all I have to digest it, and that will take time. Today I read that writing memoir involves the firing of neurons that were involved in the original experience. No wonder I feel so gosh darn tired with revision. I re-live experiences, again and again and again.
Enough about me: Love to see you “puzzling” with your niece. Cheers and Happy Fourth!
July 4, 2018 at 03:00
How exciting, Marian! I hear you about all the time that is required to digest, consider and incorporate changes from beta readers. Once that deadline for my readers arrives, I’ll get swamped and I’ll need a little cabin in the woods with a “Don’t disturb” sign for many weeks to come. But, it will be an enjoyable and eye-opening experience for both of us to read everyone’s impressions and to gain more insight into the reader’s mind and maybe even into our own story.
As far as reliving those experiences, I hope that most of them are positive ones for you. I’ve read about how hard it is to write memoir for the reasons you describe, but I seem to be doing OK with that part. Well, most of those parts. There is one episode that always makes me tear up (my own writing does that, how weird, huh?), though, even though I read it many times.
July 3, 2018 at 20:14
Letting a long-term writing project out of your hands is always a leap of faith and a scary moment! Hoping your beta readers do their job gently but effectively and that your book is all the better for it. Meanwhile, I also hope the step away freshens your view of the project once you have it back. I always find a break from the material is so helpful. Once again, enjoy your time in Belgium with family and old friends!
July 4, 2018 at 03:04
I have no doubt about the huge improvements that will occur, once I have gone through the suggestions of my beta readers and incorporated (some of) their remarks. It’ll be a lot of work, but very helpful and rewarding, I expect. Breaks are good, and I can’t wait to dive into the project again. I think the real break will come once we’re back in Zesty, though, free of family chaos and the dramas of daily life in a western environment. 🙂 Thanks for the continued well wishes here in Belgium, Lexie.
July 4, 2018 at 04:40
I’m really glad that you are taking a good break right now, Liesbet. You pour so much of yourself, so much energy and commitment into everything you do. Even in the jigsaw puzzle making with your niece you look like you’re fully there, fully present. There’s an immediacy to all of your writing that is wonderfully appealing, making your readers feel that they are alongside you as you have experiences.
When you give so much of yourself, it’s especially important to take time to refill the well. I hope that your time in Belgium is every bit the opportunity for rejuvenation and revitalization that you need and so richly deserve.
July 4, 2018 at 14:00
Hi Karen! You are opening my eyes with your comment. I never realized the commitment and energy I put in my projects, or that this is actually noticeable anyway, but you are right. When I start something, I want to do it well, and I want to finish it and give everything I can to bring something to success. I just never saw it as clearly as you just put in words. And the fact that the reader feels like she is alongside me is one of the best compliments I ever heard. Especially since that is a goal I have with my memoir. I feel like you know me so well. This is quite amazing. Thank you!
I do think that Mark and I always have and take a lot on our plate living a so-called relaxed lifestyle, and we’ve been extremely involved and busy the last few months with multiple big projects and life changes. We are both exhausted, really. While we are slowing down a little bit now, being surrounded by many family members and being part of their hectic lives is not yet the revitalization we’re after, but once back to Zesty, that is certainly the first goal! 🙂
July 4, 2018 at 11:34
Enjoy reading about your journey. Happy IWSG!
July 4, 2018 at 14:02
Thanks, Juneta. Happy 4th of July!
July 4, 2018 at 12:45
You should try to take your mind off the manuscript completely, so that you’ll be able to look at it with fresh eyes when it comes back from the beta readers.
Meanwhile, enjoy your time with family and friends! 🙂
July 4, 2018 at 14:05
Great tip, Michelle, but a bit hard to follow. I’ll try. Thing is that when something arrives from a beta reader now (ahead of the deadline) I want to incorporate things already. “Luckily”, I don’t have time to do so yet, but my mind goes to it, of course. 🙂 Also, if everything comes at once, it will be extremely overwhelming.
Enjoying my time in Belgium! Thank you.
July 6, 2018 at 09:23
Liesbet I am so with you on not knowing the cost of drinks. It seems common in the US not to list them. My daughter and I did a trip to Miami a few years ago and each ordered a Mojito. They were $25 each! Can you even imagine? That cured me from ever feeling badly about asking.
Enjoy your time with family and always good to have a true break.
July 7, 2018 at 01:37
Ouch, Sue! I hope that was the best mojito you’ve ever had. Maybe you had to pay them for their time, so much per minute of creating this wonderful drink. 🙂 The perfect “lesson” to ask before you order, for sure. Those kinds of surprises hurt.
My time in Belgium is ending. It was nice, interesting and a bit sad. A very different experience than usually, since I totally shifted my priorities for this three-week visit.
July 6, 2018 at 12:15
I think if you’re succeeding at enjoying your writing, then you will definitely affect readers.
July 7, 2018 at 01:38
If that’s true, I’ll be very happy. I agree with you that a writer who writes passionately and genuinely has got to affect readers. Thanks for your visit, Patricia!
July 6, 2018 at 18:09
“…There is one episode that always makes me tear up (my own writing does that, how weird, huh?), though, even though I read it many times…” I am curious what episode. There was one part where I got teary-eyed.
I LOVE you style of writing. I LOVE your stories.
July 7, 2018 at 01:41
Hi Volkan! You’ve been such an incredible help with all your notes and thorough reading of my manuscript. And, with your enthusiasm and encouragement. Thank you so much!
The scene I’m talking about is the one about Kali in Puerto Rico. We sure have had other heartbreaks, but for some reason (maybe because this was my first experience with such emotions), this one always “gets” me. I’m curious about the scene that was tough on you (without giving away too much :-)).
July 8, 2018 at 22:22
I have had only a little experience with using beta readers. When I had a complete draft of the novel that I was working on before this one, I gave it to three trusted readers. I found myself to be very anxious about what their feedback would be. The first reader was too busy to read it at the time, and I don’t know if she ever did. At any rate, I never received any comments from her. The second reader read it and phoned to go over her comments, but I was having some crisis at work (I no longer remember what) and was not prepared to hear her comments at that time. (I think I was too afraid to hear them). The third provided detailed oral feedback which was really to the point and useful. However, I felt overwhelmed by the revision process and have barely started the revisions. From this I learned that it is important to a) choose readers who are truly willing to read and critique the WIP, b) be clear about what you need and when, and c) find the courage to accept the comments with grace and an open mind.
Jude
July 9, 2018 at 02:14
I think the beta reader thing is a tricky one. You have to be totally committed and ready for feedback, no matter how it comes across or what it is. Before I sent my manuscript out, I made sure that the people who showed interest earlier on and who I wanted to engage were still interested and available. One of those people had other plans this summer, so I didn’t send the script to her. The others were still on-board, a decent group of them. This will probably “bite me in the butt”, since there will be heaps of feedback for me to consider and incorporate. I picked them, based on several factors. We will see what happens when mid-August (the deadline) rolls around. 🙂
As I told my beta readers, I have thick skin and I want them to be honest. That’s what helps improve a book! Most of them know me in person, or they have followed my blog for a while, so they know my personality and desire to being true and straightforward. I also included a sheet with points to look out for, but it is important to me that they provide feedback the way they feel most comfortable with, by email, track changes, …
It looks like that one experience you had with beta readers taught you exactly what you needed to know to go forward with the WIP. I hope you find some time this summer to pick it back up, despite being busy with many other (creative) projects.
July 9, 2018 at 09:19
Your excepts always leave me wanting more. I remember the days of not caring what a drink costs. Now I can’t imagine ordering one without asking. Great to hear that you have gotten a transcript into the hands of beta readers. Every day a step closer. You’ve really made a lot of progress. I am so proud of you!
July 12, 2018 at 06:09
Thank you, Lisa! And, I’m proud of you following your dreams of sailing around the world, and coming many steps closer to completion with each passage. Awesome! Almost a full circumnavigation…
July 9, 2018 at 18:35
I think with part of being a writer will always come self-doubt. But I have much confidence in you and your memoir because I love what I’ve read so far in your excerpts and they haven’t even been polished yet! Good on you for gathering your tribe of betas. We all need them. So proud of you that you’re already at the beta stage. So exciting! 🙂 xx
July 12, 2018 at 06:17
I’m glad to read you’ve been enjoying my excerpts, Debby. Just little pieces, without revealing too much. Not sure how much more polishing I will do, but I’m looking forward to reading and incorporating the feedback from my wonderful team of beta readers! This has been a long project (going on three years, but I only managed to really focus on it a couple of months at a time), so I’m antsy to wrap it up this year if at all possible. We also plan a new and exciting chapter in our travel life, so I better be done soon. 🙂
July 12, 2018 at 06:59
Well I’m so proud of you girlfriend! Living life on the road, working another job, and writing a book is a huge accomplishment. You are a true warrior woman!
Now I’m looking forward to hearing about your next chapter in travel too!! 🙂 x
July 10, 2018 at 14:50
Congratulations on reaching the next step in the process! I hope your beta readers love it (and have helpful comments).
I miss the whole “writing for fun” aspect of telling stories as a child. Somehow, when we reach adulthood, it’s entirely different, and not always in a good way.
July 12, 2018 at 06:21
Thanks, JH. So far, so good. I’ve received some constructive criticism and positive reactions.
I hear you about how things have changed since adulthood. I think that’s why I like writing non-fiction, because I have real life stories to tell and I can still do that with my blog, articles and memoir. It doesn’t require much fantasy, but I think my experiences in life provide enough material without being boring. At least, I hope so and I aim for it. Now, and in the future. The writing, and the living. 🙂
July 13, 2018 at 20:27
Hi Liesbet
I love the excerpt. I can feel the stress and frustration you experience at not knowing the price of drinks. Some bars a Cosmo might be $7.00 and in a bar down the street it might be $10.00. Then there’s Happy Hour when the price is $4.50. It’s crazy.
Good Work
Laura
July 15, 2018 at 09:57
Thanks for the compliment and encouragement about my writing, Laura. We miss the Caribbean when it comes to drink prices and happy hours! We rarely go out in the US, and when we do, I’m baffled at the prices of alcoholic drinks (and food) these years. That’s why we usually enjoy everything at home. It’s a bit different when we are with friends and family, though. We tend to spend much more going out.
July 20, 2018 at 09:15
Liesbet, I had a smile on my face when I read that it was difficult to order a drink without knowing the price. It is a real bug bear with me when wanting something to eat and drink and having to enquire how much it is. We need to be frugal or we wouldn’t be able to do this lifestyle. Looks like you had some quality time with your family 🙂
July 20, 2018 at 11:13
I never thought there were so many people who agree with me that it is annoying to order drinks (or anything) without knowing the price. I guess there are more frugal folks out there, reading my blog, than I thought. And, it makes me happy to know I’m not alone, that I’m not the “weird” one. When travel and adventures are important in someone’s life, and that someone who isn’t rich or doesn’t make good money, knowing the price of everything is a necessity, since that’s where the money will have to come from. 🙂
Still enjoying our family time, but we will be happy to return to Zesty next week!