Every first Wednesday of the month, the IWSG (Insecure Writer’s Support Group) engages writers to share their fears, thoughts, progress, struggles, excitement, encouragement, or anything really, about their writing. A different question is posed each month as a writing prompt. Answering it is optional.
This amazing, supportive group of writers was founded by Alex J. Cavanaugh. Today, the co-hosts are Ronel Janse van Vuuren, Mary Aalgaard, Madeline Mora-Summonte, and Ellen @ The Cynical Sailor. Feel free to swing by their sites and see what they’re up to.
The question for this month’s blog hop is long: “It’s been said that the benefits of becoming a writer who does not read is that all your ideas are new and original. Everything you do is an extension of yourself, instead of a mixture of you and another author. On the other hand, how can you expect other people to want your writing, if you don’t enjoy reading? What are your thoughts?
My answer
I believe that reading benefits people, whether they are writers or not. The advantage of being a writer who reads is that you always learn, consciously or not, and this improves your craft. The disadvantage of reading for me is that, 1) I compare myself to other writers, leading to two trains of thought, either “I’ll never be able to write this well and become successful” or “I can and do write like that, so why am I not becoming successful?” And, 2) I get annoyed by typos, feel like I have to proofread and correct the copy, and try to retain wisdom. As a result, reading often feels like work instead of enjoyment. In general, reading does make me a better writer.
However, I don’t agree that not reading means that you don’t enjoy reading, as suggested in this question. I rarely read because of time constraints, not because I don’t enjoy it. Also, writers might purposefully NOT read much (in certain genres) to develop original ideas and unique voices. Nothing wrong with that.
My book progress
Mark, Maya, and I spent the entire month of September in our camper van Zesty – the last twelve days also joined by my parents. Needless to say, there has been zero memoir progress last month. Instead, I had a fantastic time discovering and exploring Cape Breton (Nova Scotia), Prince Edward Island, and new areas in New Brunswick and Quebec. We also returned to Acadia National Park and followed the Maine coast back to Massachusetts. Blogs about those last destinations are upcoming.
Unlike other months with no writing, editing, or submitting progress, I don’t feel guilty or bad about it. That’s an improvement! As a matter of fact, I’m still “happily” collecting agent rejections. Receiving some kind of a reaction is always better than hearing nothing, which happens with most of my submissions. Unfortunately, I have yet to obtain constructive criticism, suggestions, or tips, let alone an agent requesting the manuscript or offering representation.
I’ve gathered 28 query rejections out of 80 submissions. Here are a few of my most recent, “personal” ones (as opposed to form rejections), starting with my favorite:
“Dear Ms. Collaert,
Thanks so much for sending your query – I appreciate the chance to take a look at your project. I’m sorry to say, though, that I’m going to step aside instead of asking to read more.
Please bear in mind that everybody has different tastes and interests – my decision is based on my present workload, and also based on the kind of material that I’m presently representing. That said, this is a crazily subjective business: I absolutely think you should keep looking for representation because what works for one agent (or publisher) may not work as well for another. I’m afraid, though, that I cannot recommend someone for it.
Very best of luck!
XXX”
“Hi Liesbet,
Thank you so much for giving me a chance to see your work. I’ve now had a chance to review your query and I’m sorry to say I don’t feel I’m connecting wholeheartedly with your writing, despite its many charms. So at this time, I feel it best to step aside.
Please know that this is a very subjective business and that tastes range widely among agents. Someone else may feel very differently and you deserve someone who is passionate about your work and is confident about their ability to position it.
I truly appreciate the look and wish you nothing but the best of luck with your future endeavors.
Sincerely,
XXX”
“Dear Liesbet,
Thank you for your email. Unfortunately, I must decline the opportunity to represent your work as the memoir category is a crowded one. I wish you the best of luck in finding enthusiastic literary representation.
All best,
XXX”
“Not for us, thanks.”
“Dear Liesbet,
Thank you so much for giving me a chance to consider [your memoir]. Unfortunately, this doesn’t feel like the right project for me at this time. I’m so sorry, but this is a pass for me.
Please remember that this is a highly subjective industry, and what doesn’t work for me may be exactly what another agent loves. It only takes one yes to get you in the door!
I wish you the best of luck in your search!
Sincerely,
XXX”
What’s next?
I plan to finish the year with a primary focus on writing and my finished memoir, starting with queries to more agents and finally contacting publishers. From the moment my parents return to Belgium (October 7th), I am in a position again to do so. More about that later.
Do you have experience with rejections? Do you think reading improves someone’s writing or hinders it?
October 2, 2019 at 16:05
Hi Liesbet! How fun to have your parents visiting and to be able to show them around in Zesty! From the photos it looks like you visited some beautiful places and had some fun. As far as agent and manuscript rejections–yep! Been there, done that. That is why I decided to skip the entire thing and do it myself. After having two books that were published by a publishing house, and discovering they literally did little or nothing, I also decided to self publish. It was THE BEST DECISION EVER! I strongly recommend that you put all the effort you are putting into find an agent into tweaking your book as well as you possibly can and then just put it out yourself. Not only will you make more money return, but it will find its own audience perfectly. Just say’in…. ~Kathy
October 4, 2019 at 18:31
Hi Kathy,
Thanks for sharing your experience and your input about self-publishing. I have a feeling I might end up there. My problem is that I’m a perfectionist and I don’t know how comfortable I am putting my best possible project out there, as I’m a novice memoir writer and I’d love to get a professional editor involved. To do this myself – hiring an editor without a publishing house – would cost thousands of dollars, which I can’t afford. So, I’ll hold out hope a bit longer and then figure out something else.
Another advantage of self-publishing is that once you figure out the ropes, publishing subsequent books – like you’re doing – will become a bit easier.
October 2, 2019 at 16:34
Not sure I like the “Not for us” response. Boo! Enjoy your time with your parents, Liesbet. I’m happy they’re visiting. Keep pushing through those rejections, girl. I was rejected for years by Woman’s World Magazine, submitting short stories. In November, they will publish my sixth story.
October 2, 2019 at 19:56
😀
October 4, 2019 at 18:35
Hi Jill,
I’m sorry to hear about your tough start with those rejections. But, I’m also happy to hear about those rejections, because they had you determined and focused and led to all the acceptances by Woman’s World Magazine now!
I’m having decent luck with my sailing and travel articles and hope to write non-fiction stories in the future as well. They seem more manageable than books. Of course, I have about a hundred ideas for books as well, though.
October 5, 2019 at 15:26
Don’t forget the book ideas I have for you too, Liesbet! 🙂
October 8, 2019 at 09:53
I have been thinking about those, too! 🙂
October 2, 2019 at 16:47
Some response is better than none. It’s all about timing – you just have to hit the right editor or agent.
And taking some time off with family shouldn’t make you feel guilty. Glad you just enjoyed.
October 4, 2019 at 18:37
When I just travel with Mark and Maya, I often feel guilty not accomplishing any writing/editing/submitting, but having my parents around is different, as I only see them once a year. Their visit is almost a bit of vacation for us as well. 🙂
Cheers to the right timing! One of these months…
October 2, 2019 at 17:43
I total agree with your priorities this past month, Liesbet.
Thank you for sharing the agents’ letters with us. My first thought was the same as Jill’s, “Boo to them!”
My second thought is the same as Alex’s – “Your agent is out there — keep going!”
October 4, 2019 at 18:39
Hey Donna! Thank you so much for your encouragement. And, for continuing to believe in me. You are such an important part of my cheerleader team! Reading that the memoir market is flooded is not making me very happy, but maybe one day, I do hit the right person…
October 2, 2019 at 18:37
I agree with Alex – timing is everything! Wishing you luck with the project
October 4, 2019 at 18:41
Thank you, Jemi. In Dutch there is an expression: “De aanhouder wint.” This loosely translates to “Persistence wins.” And, I have a lot of that. 🙂
October 2, 2019 at 19:55
Liesbet, I loved this post and all the photos, especially the one of your parents.
Do I have experience with rejection? Yes, even as a self-published author on a book tour. In Lancaster County, PA, aka Mennonite Land, I queried a combination grocery story/gift shop known for its Mennonite leanings. After I sent an Amazon link with mostly 5-star reviews for my memoir, the terse remark came back “We are not interested in your memoir.” No reason, just that.
Well, one just has to move on. Yes?
Yes!
October 4, 2019 at 18:44
Yes to moving on! Although, that’s a pretty rude rejection from a business that could have benefited from having you do a presentation and signing in their shop. It sounds like the perfect collaboration there. I’m thinking that maybe they weren’t too thrilled about someone “exposing” Mennonite culture. The good thing is you have heaps of positive and encouraging experiences during your book tour, so those should and will take center stage!
October 2, 2019 at 19:57
What gorgeous photos from Quebec City — and how neat to have family join you on your adventures. The October IWSG was a difficult question for me — and I’m glad you dug in and related the question actually to your own time for reading and for writing. Maybe I’m too vulnerable about receiving rejections, but yours made me smile. I once completed a 10-page, single-spaced form for a small publishing house. Their response. “If we are interested, you will here from us in the next six months.” So I self-published and have enjoyed learning new skills in the process. The other highlight for me is your ability to enjoy each day on the road, knowing the writing will be there when you’re ready. Hope the good weather continues. Know you have good companions on the road and online!
October 4, 2019 at 18:53
I’m looking forward to reading your IWSG post one of these days, Beth. When my parents left, probably. Part of this month’s question did, indeed, not make much sense to me, so I understand your struggle with it as well.
I’m glad you decided on self-publishing, since that really seems to work for you and it has brought you success. And, you reuse those precious skills as well.
Lots of agency guidelines state that they will contact you in 12 weeks or so, if they are interested. So, most of the time, they leave you hanging and wondering whether they even received or read the proposal and query letter. It’s a tough process!
That ten-page form you created is crazy! But, then again, my book proposal is 60 pages (including a sample chapter) and I worked two months full-time to produce it, without any return or reward so far. I’m not sure anything even read or scanned it. I did the same kind of proposal thing trying to sell our business a year ago, with the same result: it was all for nothing. It certainly isn’t for a lack of trying or determination!
I’m glad you liked my prioritizing life on the road, sightseeing, and family time. I don’t often do that or feel OK with that. 🙂 Thank you for your continued support and positive enforcement!
October 3, 2019 at 04:52
I don’t think there can be good writing without the experience of good reading. Understanding that some people don’t have time to read while they write, anyone who writes well must have been a reader at some point. Even the bad books teach us what not to do.
October 4, 2019 at 18:54
Good points, Liza! Reading and writing go hand in hand. I just wish my hands were bigger. 🙂 Thank you for visiting and commenting!
October 3, 2019 at 06:48
So interesting to see the rejection letters! I like how most of them emphasized how subjective the process is – rejection doesn’t mean your work isn’t good, just that it’s not right for them.
Cute picture of your parents with Maya. I need to catch up on your Canada posts. PEI is on my bucket list. I’ve been enjoying seeing your pictures on FB.
October 4, 2019 at 18:58
I think the remark about subjectiveness, while true, is a nice way of saying “thanks, but no thanks”. Almost every agent has it in their response or standard form rejection, if they bother to reply. If you want to read more rejections letter, just let me know. I’m collecting them like sea shells. 🙂
Our trip to Canada was quite successful, despite my husband thinking it rained too much. PEI was a lovely experience, but we only spent about four or five days there, including the two hurricane ones. I’m happy to read that you enjoy the photo posts on Facebook, Ellen.
October 3, 2019 at 12:43
I agree with Alex too. Hope you have a great visit. Happy IWSG Day!
October 4, 2019 at 18:59
Thanks, Juneta. So far so good with the parents visit. We are now surrounded by both sets of parents. 🙂 This is a once in a decade experience, though.
October 3, 2019 at 15:08
Well if I had to read rejections like that I would just stop reading, LOL! You have a thick skin for sure, Liesbet. You know what impresses me about you?…you just keep having faith and then you go out and have loads of fun! I too have been enjoying your fab photos and adventures on IG. I have to agree with Kathy about self-publishing, as I am getting to the finish line of my fitness book! And for me, yes, reading has made me a MUCH better writer, at least in the non-fiction genre. Now, off to read some student papers :/
October 4, 2019 at 19:06
Hi Terri,
Even reading student papers is reading that leads to better writing, right? I’m happy to read you’re approaching the publishing stage with your fitness book. Well done! That impresses me about you – you can focus on the big picture and projects, despite taking care of and dealing with so many other things like injuries, work, leisure time, photography, blogging, your dogs, and exercise. Phew!
As far as the “thick skin” goes, I decided early on to make collecting rejections a hobby. I am saving them all in one document and keep track of everything on another sheet. It’s almost fun! I don’t even expect to ever hear anything positive. That’s the only way to not set yourself up for disappointment and feeling like a failure. 🙂
October 3, 2019 at 23:01
How great your parents got to visit and you had time “on your turf” together. Lovely photos ~ looks like somewhere in Europe.
Re rejection, I remember Ben once reading about the statistics of success and that you can expect one response out of every 25 you send and that doesn’t guarantee of course that the response is positive! You got some encouraging ones though. If this is what you are determined to do, then I say, keep at it, don’t give up! It just takes one yes. If you can’t live with the rejection, or the hassles of sending is out, then I agree with some other readers re self publishing. Could you do both? Or would agents balk at that? I recall reading that Elizabeth Gilbert has hundreds of rejections before she achieved success.
I think reading “improves” someones writing, or rather “enriches” it. With any creative pursuit, the more we see (paintings) or read, I think, the better. The influences and impact may be subtle.
Peta
October 4, 2019 at 19:15
Hi Peta!
One response out of 25 queries!? That’s insane. Luckily, I’ve had a bit more than that. Yet, a “yes” is elusive. I read somewhere that one out of a hundred queries receives a positive response, hence my 100 agent goal. Haha. Statistics, right? We have enough experience with that, as in statistics don’t seem to affect or include us. 🙂
If I decide to self-publish, it will most likely be because this project has been dragging on long enough. I usually have enough energy and determination to do what it takes to reach my goal. But, there is a limit to my time commitment. Four years is starting to push it!
I think once you go the self-publishing route, it will take enough effort and full-time focus that I’ll give up on querying at that point.
I totally agree with your statement about “exposure” to writing and other art forms and how it affects and enhances your own creativity and results.
October 4, 2019 at 00:58
Your travel sounds fun! Good luck with submitting. I’ve certainly had my share of rejections.
October 4, 2019 at 19:16
Thank you, Shannon. Rejections are part of the course, aren’t they? This time, the travels were pretty fun. Usually, they are part of our lifestyle – a combination of challenging, tiring, and exciting. 🙂
October 5, 2019 at 14:28
How nice that you at least received “encouraging rejections”. 🙂
I think reading is an essential part of becoming a writer. How can we improve if we never consider and evaluate the work of others? Of course we don’t want to copy anyone else’s voice or content; but writing without reading is like putting a baby on a bicycle and expecting a Tour de France win. Extensive reading develops a strong foundation for our writing skills.
I love to read, and wish I had time to do more of it!
October 8, 2019 at 09:53
I love your comparison of writing without reading with a baby winning the Tour de France, Diane! I think every writer has learned his/her craft by reading. Not sure how else anyone can write. Also, reading makes us appreciate words, phrases, and stories and this hopefully inspires us to write as well. Like you, I wish I had more time to read!
I’m glad you think those rejections are “encouraging”. 🙂
October 8, 2019 at 12:32
It takes a lot of courage to put yourself and your work out there, and I think most agents realize that. You certainly have my respect! 🙂
October 9, 2019 at 16:09
I take that!! 🙂
October 7, 2019 at 00:56
Brave of you to put this out there, Liesbet, rejections and all. I can’t live without a book, but I can’t read much when I have company, as I currently do. Enjoy life and the good times while you can! Who knows what’s around the corner?
October 8, 2019 at 10:00
Having company puts everything on hold, Jo, as I have experienced the last three weeks as well. Now that my parents flew back to Belgium, I don’t know what to catch up with first. It won’t be the book I have been reading for the last two months, however…
And, you are so right about not knowing what’s around the corner. I’d say we have a pretty good balance of work and pleasure figured out. 🙂
October 7, 2019 at 06:19
Hi Liesbet,
Wonderful that your parents got to visit. That’s so special. And I love your response – I think it’s spot-on.
Sorry about the 80/20 Rule post not working properly. We’ve pulled it out to update it and will be publishing it soon. Thanks for the heads-up that the link is not working. And thanks for your kind words about our destination page – it was fun to do!
All the best, Terri
October 8, 2019 at 10:03
Hi Terri! Thanks for the reply. I look forward to reading the updated 80/20 post. And, others as well. Plus, I hope to organize my blog a bit better in a far future as well. Your improvements have inspired me to do so! Clean, attractive, and straightforward blog layouts are way more attractive than cluttered one and make me return to those blogs.
October 7, 2019 at 18:53
I admire your tenacity Liesbet. No, I haven’t faced that type of rejection, as I don’t submit for trad publishing. 🙂
October 8, 2019 at 10:04
You sure know what you’re doing, Debby! And, saving yourself a lot of frustration and disappointment in the process. 🙂
October 9, 2019 at 09:10
That was my plan, lol 🙂
October 8, 2019 at 13:55
Those pictures of Quebec trigger memories of visiting there when I was at college near Montreal. Encouraging rejections sound better than form letters. I don’t submit anymore so that counts me out.
Not reading for valid reasons is not ‘not reading’ when the intention is there. September was a non-reading month for me, but taken in context of 2019, I read. Does that make sense?
October 9, 2019 at 16:28
Hi Roland! So nice you went to college in Montreal – and managed to visit Quebec. What a wonderful city, eh? 🙂 I’m hoping to post a photo essay about it soon. Self-publishing would take care of the not having to submit anymore…
Great explanation or justification of the reading process. “When the intention is there,” it’s all good. That makes me happy, because I want to read and enjoy reading. Of course, I mean books when I talk about reading, but don’t we all read all the time? It’s like writers write all the time and every bit helps us in the process to achieve greater things, even my daily diary entries! 🙂
October 9, 2019 at 10:48
I like this question about writers and reading. I guess I always thought it was a given that in order to be a good writer one would be a reader. I like to read but I am a slow reader. It usually take me at least 50 pages before a book really starts to hold my interest and I find that it is very easy for me to get distracted before that point. I’d like to be a good writer, though, so I really do think I need to read more.
Sorry for all the rejections. At least they mostly seem polite about it. It has got to be so hard after putting so much work into something.
Your parents are adorable. I hope you all had a great time.
October 9, 2019 at 16:32
Like you, I am a slow reader, because I really want to grasp what is being written and I have the annoying pet peeve to discover (and hate) typos. I also reread parts that don’t make much sense (at first). Distractions are usually other priorities or time restraints. I can’t believe I read two books a week as a child, while I now read only three or four a year!! I really wish to tilt the scale on that hobby. And, I do think to be a good writer, you have to be an avid reader. It can’t be all intuition and talent. 🙂
I’m pretty immune to the rejections, to be honest. It would be nice to receive something positive one of these months, though. We had a nice time with my parents, but I’m glad some kind of normalcy has now returned.
October 10, 2019 at 15:30
I admit I do the comparing thing all the time. When I read a really great author I despair whether I’ll ever attain those dizzy heights. Nevertheless, I love to read. When the kids were little I had no time for it but now they’re teenagers I am reading again. Joy!
October 11, 2019 at 13:59
Hi Yvette! How wonderful that you get to read again. Enjoy! I can imagine not having time for that with little kids – I don’t even have time with an adult dog. 🙂 I also believe that reading books or not has to do with priorities – in my case anyway. If I would spend less time reading and commenting to blogs, I would surely pick up a book more often. Same with spending at least half an hour every evening writing my diary!
October 11, 2019 at 12:07
So wait, let me get this straight, the writing business is a subjective one and not everyone likes everything? Wow. It’s like they all shared that one paragraph with one another.
Like you, I compare myself to almost every writer I read, and also feel the same two things- I’ll never be that good. Wait, I’m way better than this person. Hard not to feel that way. I’ve found that the only way through that for me is to see what each writer does well and try to adapt my writing accordingly. Clearly, I haven’t mastered that yet, though I do thing the hardest part of writing anything is trying to explain it to an agent in a manner that inspires said agent to act.
Or to make it simpler, I suck at queries.
October 11, 2019 at 14:06
Hi Ryan!
Welcome back and I hope you are feeling better!!
I’m glad you picked up on that “common denominator” (is that what it’s called?) from most of the agents that did reply! It must be mentioned in the “agent handbook for polite replies to authors”, that it’s a subjective business and such. What worries me the most is when agents tell me that there is no market for my book, or – in between the lines – that they don’t believe in it. That’s a tad disheartening…
I agree with you about the difficulty in querying. You actually need to grab that agent’s attention with the first few lines of your query or sample pages. For that reason, I played with the idea to call my book “Barefoot Bitch” or “Boat Bitch”. That surely would get their attention and encourage them to read more, no? And then, later in the query, I could write “Fooled you. The title of my book is actually ‘Plunge'”. What do you think? 🙂
November 2, 2019 at 13:33
Liesbet, how fun to have your parents visiting and the chance to show them around parts of eastern Canada and Massachusetts. Did all of you find space to sleep in Zesty?
It’s tough to get rejections. I’ve had many of them over the years, both for my academic and literary writing. The academic ones provide feedback, and a rejection either would lead me to do a major rewrite, or in a few cases to abandon the piece. The literary ones unfortunately rarely provide feedback. Luckily, I’ve had way more successes than rejections, which has kept me going. And, surprisingly, when I submitted my book of poetry to a small press, she accepted it immediately with hardly any changes.
My insight is that you get a better response if you send the ms. to someone who knows you or knows of you than if you send it out “cold.” That’s why “meet the agents” events at writers’ conferences are so popular. Have you considered contacting people who have published your articles to see if any of them will publish it or give you a referral?
Jude
November 2, 2019 at 20:39
Hi Jude!
My parents traveled with us, but didn’t sleep in the van. I booked accommodations ahead of time for them, or – whenever possible – for all of us. I”m hoping to post a blog about the part of our trip in Maine soon.
I’ve never received any feedback from agents, about my query letter or why they are rejecting my submission or what I could do better to be successful. I wish I did have some of that constructive criticism, but agents don’t have time to create personalized rejection letter and most don’t even send a reply at all.
I’m glad to read you’ve had mostly successes on your road to publication. I can’t complain about my article contributions (I wish I had time to write and submit more of those). As far as referrals go, one of the magazine editors I wrote for provided an early endorsement for my memoir, which is part of my book proposal. I don’t have any contacts (editors, magazine publishers) who also publish books, though. I like you idea and I should do some more research to see whether anyone I do know can get me in touch with an agent or publisher or can give me a referral. I’ve asked two sailing memoir writers already, but that didn’t pan out.
I also did have one person (a writer I coincidentally met in Sedona, AZ) recommend an agent to me and she promised to have a look at my manuscript, but that led to nothing as well. If I could afford going to a Writer’s Conference and there is actually one wherever I am at some point, it would be the best place and way to meet an agent. I have heard, however, that for every agent meeting you’d like to arrange, an extra fee on top of the Conference price, is required… At this point, I will extend my queries to niche publishers.
November 6, 2019 at 02:27
Do I have experience with rejections? Do I?!
Of course I do.
One of the best things I ever did was make it into a game. It started with 100 Rejections in a Year, but that was too hard to control, so I changed it to 100 Submissions in a Year. Since each submission was a “win,” the rejections mattered to me less and less.
I “won” the challenge for 2.5 years, until I got an agent.
The Maritimes are so pretty. I’m glad you gave yourself the time and breathing space to enjoy them.
November 6, 2019 at 11:10
So it took you 2.5 years to get an agent, huh? Wow. And, you’ve got so much talent (and by now many successes) to boot. I’m sure you’ve told me this before, but it is still shocking!
I’m going for 150 submissions this year, as in queries to agents (I have more luck selling articles, but haven’t had time for that this year). Although, after 60 or so sent out, I’m losing hope a bit. But, I’m determined to give this route all I’ve got before changing gears. Thing is that I feel like I have to rework my query again… so much time that’s needed for all this and I don’t have it, since paying work and life on the road take priority. Darn.